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"Let’s just accept our asses and get on with our lives.  It’s like your Visa bill.  Why worry about it when you know you’ll never pay it off even if you live to be a hundred? Your ass is like that.  It will always be with you - like debt, with interest doubling daily."
– Embracing Your Big Fat Ass

Table of Contents

Section I The Birth of the B-FABs (Big Fat Ass Babes)

What's in a Word?
Embracing Your Big Fat Ass
Born to Be a B-FAB
Self-Image -- A Snapshot from Behind
It's All My Mother's Fault
Big Beautiful Fat Ass Babe Society

Section II Your Life as a Basket Case

Your Family, a Heavy Matter
The Annoying Little Voice Inside Your Head
The Local Fix
Addictions and Compulsions of a B-FLAB (Big Flabby Ass Babe)
Checking Out

Section III Romance and Your Big Fat Ass

Romantic Moods and Moves
That Asshole Todd
Your Backside in the Bedroom
The D-List Boyfriend

Section IV Clothing, Friendship, Shopping, and Other Distractions

Fashion -- Not Just for Skinny Babes
Counter Intelligence
Bonding with Your Fellow B-FABs
The Secrets of a Fat Ass Date

Section V A Working Woman with a Waddle

Your Job with a Bouncing BFA
How My Big Fat Ass Paid the Bills
Working for Food

Section VI Attempted Health and Weight Loss Projects

Dieting Sucks Because Baby's Got Back
My Life in Diets
Exercising Your Big Fat Ass

Section VII Leaving It All Behind

Managing Fat Ass Sprawl on Trips of Any Kind
Getting Frisked at the Airport
Pooling Around at the Holiday Inn
Happy Holidass
Christmas Eve Chronicle

In Conclusion The Art of Masstery

The Asstrological Reader
Acknowledgments



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